


Privacy

by miss_aligned



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Angst, Mass Effect 3, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-24
Updated: 2016-05-24
Packaged: 2018-06-10 12:29:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,058
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6956512
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/miss_aligned/pseuds/miss_aligned
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A new piece of information finds its way to Kaidan at last. It proves to be something out of his worst nightmares and he doesn't know how to handle it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Privacy

“Shepard.”

Her gaze snapped up and away from the console where she’d been diligently working. She hadn’t heard that edge in his voice in quite some time. It was enough to call her attention immediately away from the war brewing across the galaxy to focus on him.

“Something wrong?” Her voice was tinged with a little more concern than she had anticipated.

“I need to talk to you. Right now,” Kaidan looked distraught, but Shepard was having a very difficult time figuring out the cause.

She glanced around the war room. There were a few people moving around, but most were still engrossed in what they were doing, or at least dutifully making it seem that way. Few of the crew ever really ignored the Major’s presence… herself included. When her gaze landed upon him again, he gave a subtle jerk of his head towards the door, signaling that he intended for the talk to be a little more private.

She followed his lead without another word. His shoulders were tense as he moved, his gait stiff. The gentle ease in his movements and the subtle swagger he usually exhibited in her presence had disappeared. He was angry. The realization of it caused her heart to beat a little faster, her mind frantically trying to decipher the problem. She realized with no small amount of frustration, that it could have been any of a number of things.

Once the elevator doors closed behind them, he turned to face her. “I just had a little chat with Liara.” Kaidan leaned back against the wall, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Okay,” Shepard responded, not sure if she was supposed to glean some important information from that statement. “I take it you didn’t like catching up with her? Do I have to go rough her up or something?”

Seemingly unamused, Kaidan answered. “She told me how Cerberus got a hold of your body after the Normandy went down over Alchera.”

“Oh.” Somehow, this wasn’t the conversation that Shepard was expecting.

“You knew.” He sounded sad at the realization.

“Yes.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” The irritation previously written in his features had shifted to sorrow in mere seconds. The sight of it made her heart ache.

Shepard remained silent for a long while, trying to find the right words to put his mind at ease. Liara had told her long ago that she had been the one to give Cerberus the corpse, and that it had been an awful choice to make. In the end, it had worked out for the best… more or less. There was no aspect of the situation that had occurred in those two years of her being off the grid that Kaidan had taken well, however, and for that reason she had to phrase things delicately. “Liara was the one to tell me. I had faith that she would tell you, too, when she was ready.”

“So I had to hear it from the person who handed you over to a terrorist group, a group who paid handsomely, I imagine, instead of turning you over to the Alliance, your family, or me.” His hands were shaking. She could tell he was trying to be reasonable and even-keeled on the subject, but it was obvious to her that he was struggling to contain his rage and heartache.

“I’m sorry, Kaidan. I honestly didn’t think you’d want to hear all the details so soon. I’m not particularly pleased about how it all played out, either.” She instinctively took a step closer to him, wanting to hug him, but she stopped herself, knowing better. They both carried many invisible wounds that hadn’t quite healed yet and she had no intention of making him uncomfortable.

“I would have preferred to hear something like that from you, so I wouldn’t want to shoot the messenger.”

“I was _dead_ , Kaidan. It’s not really my confession to make. Liara did what she thought was best. It’s not fair to punish her for it now.”

He rubbed the bridge of his nose. “Why would she make a decision like that? Why wouldn’t she tell any of us?”

Shepard didn’t have the answers he sought. Her mouth hung open for a moment while she tried to think of something soothing to say, but nothing came to mind. “What would you have done if she had told you?”

“I don’t know. I would have stopped her from giving you to Cerberus.” His voice was shaking now.

The door of the elevator slid open, revealing the entrance to her cabin. Shepard stepped forward, tugging Kaidan by the wrist to follow.

Once they cleared the door and it slid closed behind them, she pulled him into a tight hug. Consequences be damned, Shepard didn’t have the heart to let him be so upset and think he was alone in his outrage at the situation. He went rigid at first, but she could hear his heart thundering in his chest… not unlike her own.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t have any say in it at the time, but if I had, I wouldn’t have gone that direction, either. Maybe it’s best that we weren’t involved. I’m here now.” His tension melted away in her embrace, his arms curling around her tightly as he sighed. The frightening familiarity of the gesture seemed to hit them both hard, something that had been missed and sorely needed.

Shepard released her grip on him, but Kaidan wasn’t so willing to let go. “I searched for so long. We had nothing to bury. There was no closure. I couldn’t–” His words were halted by his own sniffle over her shoulder as he crushed her into his chest.

They stood there in silence for a long while, cloaked in darkness in the small space between the elevator and her cabin. She couldn’t think of anything to say that would make him feel any better about the situation, but she offered whatever comfort she could. When they finally pulled away from one another, they both scrubbed tears from their cheeks and chuckled at their similarly and suddenly reddened eyes.

“So just to be clear,” Shepard said at last, a smirk lifting the edge of her lips. “Liara’s still alive, right?”

He snickered softly as he ran a hand through his dark curls. “Yeah, don’t worry.”

“Good.”


End file.
